Praise and encouragement are two aspects that impact our children differently when used to comment any situation.
Encouragement is specific to the current act, focuses on acknowledging efforts and aims to create that urge to do good for oneself; this motivates your child to work intrinsically.
Praise, on the other hand, uses personal judgment, creates a desire to do well for others and this discourages children from learning and benefiting from independent judgment.
That being said, praise isn’t a negative parenting skill, rather it needs some keen moderation for positive results. Read on and get to know how to balance the two and use them appropriately towards achieving the best out of your child.
Difference between encouragement and praise
Encouragement and motivational comments emphasize on progress, efforts and continuous improvements rather than just getting the best results. It recognizes contributions, quality work over quantity and this fosters a sense of appreciation to their inner abilities. Children gain self-esteem from the comments and messages they receive through interactions with the world.
Encouraging your children to concentrate on their own abilities won’t cause them to compare their achievements with others, compete about who’s smarter, faster or prettier. Praise is one predominant parental tool that boosts your child’s self-esteem.
Overusing praise can be demotivating, it becomes ineffective when used beyond limits. Encouragement serves to promote perseverance while building hard work the basis of success rather than giving up after that first attempt.
Children who have been praised constantly for any fixed personal characteristics such as smarts, looks or natural intelligence are more susceptible to setbacks and challenges; they view them more as a personal reflection instead of a growth opportunity.
Those children who get used to high fives and adverse congratulatory stickers begin to expect praises after doing mundane tasks; they take it personally when such praises are not called for. This habit develops to adulthood where praises become of great importance more than the achievement itself.
It’s okay and satisfactory to express pride in your kid; it serves as a natural way of showing love and support you have for your children. What’ more important is to understand that for development and self-confidence to be witnessed; encouragement is such a useful strategy.
Children who are guided through genuine praises and receive encouragements are more resilient; they focus on their efforts and believe strongly in change through determination, they remain geared towards success, watch their steps and are less shaken by adversity.
Praise is about control, perfection and less to do with improvement and progress. Encouragement will mainly prepare your kid to accept the current status, embrace the virtue of good will and support oneself out of challenges; instead of developing pride from success or disappointment after failure.
Good decision making can only be achieved by an integrated mind that knows the basic differences between the right and the wrong. Here; experience is mandatory and this involves both the good and the bad experiences encountered in the course of life.
How to encourage your children
You can only imagine of being a good parent if you lack some vital parenting skills. Encouragement is an important skill that can be learned and used effectively to mold a responsible adult out of your kids. Good parents have faith in their children, they see an opportunity in their failures, they appreciate their mistakes as a chance for growth.
Positive expectations and consistent encouragement goes hand-in-hand and will work out to raise a competent child. Here are some tips you can utilize to practice the art of motivation and encouragement to your kid.
1. Recognize improvements and award efforts
It can be quite easy to recognize a job well done, but takes a responsible and caring parent to make some efforts and give necessary compliments. It’s not a guarantee that your child will perform exceptionally well at school, it starts really from scratch and needs support to witness big success.
Try to be an optimist in all areas of life. Be the first one to congratulate your child after a school contest, a painting competition or any contemporary home chores such as making the bed really well, or learn how to use new products in the house.
2. Focus on strengths not weaknesses
Some kids may have dogged determinations from that tender age while other may develop resistance and become stubborn to positive change and common virtues. Sometimes it takes the courage of a caring parent to really distinguish between strong character traits and liabilities in their sons and daughters’ character.
Focus on the interest and abilities that your child has. Celebrate strengths rather than concentrating on the gray areas.
3. Accept mistakes
As far as we live in a society that celebrates achievement and success, parents have the duty to accept errors and embrace them as part of positive progress. Errors are valuable learning experiences and remain unavoidable in most cases. Perfect marks and exemplary results should be valued more like mistakes since it’s through corrected errors that we gain experience and functional skills.
As a parent, it’s important to recognize your kids’ anxiety and fears; show your trust and strong belief in their abilities. Give them genuine responsibilities and allow them to practice self-control where possible. Practice empathy and demonstrate faith in your children as a way to motivate them to excellence.
Some of the praises such as; you’re so smart, you’re such a great child, you’re very beautiful, needs to be awarded carefully. Make encouragement a priority and this is the way to go.
Importance of encouragement
Encouraging your child gives him/her the moral to work hard and a determination to succeed regardless of the circumstances. It creates an internal framework which boosts their self-esteem, gives them an opportunity to self-assess their choices, social conduct, and model their attitudes in a way that’s acceptable.
Through encouragement, your children can figure out what is important and what is not worth their efforts, indefinite praises will set in reluctance once you fail to praise them to their expectation.
Showing some traces of loose trust or giving up the parenting efforts is worst injustice you can do to your child. Words of encouragement make your kid feels better every time they feel like giving up.